|
|
|
|
These are musings of everyday observations-it may relate to this site, sex in general, politics, entertainment, etc..The bottom line, it's the projection of my thoughts into words, and I hope you share your views, make suggestions, and call me on whatever you perceive to be bullshit. I'm a big good bad boy-I can take it.  |
|
Social Acceptance of Multiple Partners...
|
Posted:Feb 3, 2015 7:44 am
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2016 9:00 am
7000 Views
|
I'll get right to it; does anyone want companionship anymore, or are we all just looking to screw ourselves to oblivion? This is not a rant per se, but it's beginning to bother me a bit.
The online dating industry is now over 2 billion dollars a year, and growing. Even this site here has become a publicly traded company-I wonder how many of you knew that. There are over a billion people using one form of online dating or another, so the bottom line is, we're having tons of sex, for sure. The question is, at whose expense are we doing this? Let's look at the scenarios;
1. Lots of couples now play together, sometimes with other couples, but many of them play with single people, sometimes together, and other times with other partners separately. They're secure in their relationships, so they're just having extra fun.
2. Married people who play around secretly. Now, I'm not judging anyone here, but this demographic accounts for a large chunk of that 2 billion dollars. Married people playing secretly go back home to their spouses, leaving behind someone they just slept with.
3. Very good-looking single people. Now, these people get the most attention, right? Everyone wants a taste of them, male or female, so they get to pick and choose. In this case, they sometimes hurt people emotionally, and in other cases, they hurt themselves, all without even realizing it at first. Let's face it; good-looking people have feelings too.
4. Dishonest people. These people are by far the worst offenders-those who wear emotional masks along with their contraceptives. They say and do whatever it takes to penetrate people's defenses, leave behind the carnage, then go somewhere else to do it again, and again. And again.
5. Semi-casual partnerships. This area is rather gray, for a number of reasons which I won't delve too much into here, but these are people looking for a steady partner they can do things with both inside and outside the bedroom. No need to put a ring on it, but be about each other more than their individual selves. These people also tend to be the most vulnerable in online dating, also for a number of reasons, but I won't delve into that either.
Yes, it's now socially acceptable to have multiple sexual partners; married couples playing, poly-amorous relationships, side dishes with the main course, or any other forms of multiple partners. On the surface, it's all fun, but the fact is, whether we like it or not, someone usually gets hurt. Most of the hurt tend to suffer in silence, because they went in usually knowing what they were getting into. Some don't, because they got mixed up with a Number 4 type of person.
I've said it before, and I'll say it again-it's fine to be alone, but it sucks to be lonely. When we're young, we put more emphasis on having fun, and that's mostly a biological predisposition, so we don't care as much about being tied down. But when we get older, the emphasis gets put on having someone there to talk to, break bread with, travel with, share secrets with, go to bed and wake up with, tell us how beautiful we are, kiss us like they mean it, and just like us for who we are rather than what they want. These types of people are growing in number because no one cares about them anymore. The more closed our society becomes, where we get more attached to our electronic devices and pets than other human beings, the more we're detaching ourselves from companionship, or detaching others from it. Our closed society is beginning to create a very lonely society.
What's the solution? For starters, lets just be honest-if you're just looking for a fuck, say so-playing nice temporarily for a fuck is downright evil, and online dating makes it easy not to lie. If you can't have sex honestly, just do the world a favor and pay a . Beyond that, those of us looking for a companion can't give up. After all, you can't win if you don't play, so you'll have to endure a number of benefits of the doubt before the right partner comes along. I'm still an optimist, so I know that whatever any of us wants in life is out there-it's not always fun finding it, but finding it is so rewarding!
|
|
|
2
Comments
|
|
The American Dream, & The Politics of Blame...
|
Posted:May 21, 2014 2:38 pm
Last Updated:May 28, 2024 8:31 am
7928 Views
|
How much power do you think that the President of the United States of America actually have in said United States? The fact is, our president actually has most of his power when it comes to foreign policy, not domestic. In fact, even his foreign policy, when it involves spending money, such as in declaration of war, or foreign aid, the money part has to be approved by congress. A president usually signs bills into law, but congress makes the laws. When it comes to domestic politics, the legislative and judicial branches have more power than the executive branch.
The number one issue of the day seems to be the nation's deficit, and how people are quick to point out how it was one amount when X was president, and Y president has taken it to unprecedented levels. People also like to argue that, somehow, a bunch of lazy freeloaders are responsible for the increase in said deficit, because, you know, the freeloaders are black, so the black president is just giving away the farm to make them happy while hard working people are being made to pay their hard earned money in taxes to support the freeloaders. You know, black people don't work hard...like our president, or Oprah, or Magic Johnson. I digress.
Here's the fact: there are 3 main reasons why this nation's deficit is ballooning out of control: (1) The deficit is being paid in installments, and we barely make more than the minimum monthly payments. Like anyone who has a credit card with a revolving balance knows, if you only make the minimum payments every month, you may never pay that card off, and the finance charges only makes the balance grow higher each month. Now picture those finance charges being billions of dollars a month, and you get the idea. (2) Let's say a president asks for 1 billion dollars for a project supported by majority of people, and indeed, congress. Before congress approves the money, some members of congress tack on funds to support some pet project or another in their individual districts, so by the time the 1 billion is approved, it may be 25 billion. Guess how much they will accuse the president of wasting for the project? Not 1 billion, but the whole 25, so a lay person goes along with blaming the president for that. (3) Entitlements...those are real, but those who game the system are a very tiny minority-most of the people who collect entitlements pay into the programs. Problem is, when the Boomers were the majority paying into the system, the funds were not managed properly. Now that the Boomers are the majority of people collecting on those entitlements, a much smaller of people are paying into the system to support them, so how do you make up the difference? You borrow more money, and the deficit grows even more, along with those finance charges. It's scary, believe me, but too many people assume that illegal immigrants, or baby mamas who have just collect welfare are to blame, but they are a tiny minority, like it or not. And, they've been gaming the system for decades, not just the last 5 years, people.
Some people also think that if you work hard enough, you can pull yourself out of any financial hardship and live a good life, and anyone who is struggling financially are just making excuses. So, what happens, for example, if you have a bunch of degrees, and you earn 6 figures a year working for a corporation, and after an X number of years they kick you and other hard working people like you to the curb so that the shareholders can earn another 3 cents a share, and the CEO, already making thousands of times your salary, can get another couple million bucks in bonuses? You're forced to take a job that pays less than half as much, so you can no longer pay some bills, so you turn to government assistance for basic help, you know, like food...would that be your fault because you didn't work hard enough to be the CEO? Are you also a freeloader until you find another job that pays what you're worth? Do you still think only illegal immigrants and teenagers flip burgers? Should your government let you starve in order to stay small and not be this 'big government'? What is 'big' or 'small' government? Can we all be CEO's? If we're not CEOs, and instead are school teachers, or cops, or firemen, or restaurant workers, not being paid living wages, are we freeloaders? Can we all start small businesses? Who would you hire to work for you if everyone was their own boss? The point is, not every CEO is a hard worker, and not everyone needing government assistance is a freeloader. Most of our politics lie in the middle of all that.
Our politics in this country has gotten so poisoned now that we're conditioned to disagree with one another simply based on our political leanings. If you're a conservative, a liberal is now an opponent, so nothing that person thinks can be agreeable to you, and vice versa. Believe it or not, this is by design, and it's designed by people who can care less what your political issues are, as long as they can get you to vote, or not show up to vote, whichever is to their advantage.
We have to find a way to get that poison out of our systems, and find ways to make political decisions based on facts, and how those facts affect us in our daily lives. That means that, sometimes, a republican will actually vote for a democrat, and a democrat will vote for a republican, based on the overall assessment of that person. Everything in politics has advantages and disadvantages, and each advantage may be some someone's disadvantage, which is why in a democracy, the majority is supposed to rule. The system is rigged, and has been for a while, so it's now possible for minority to rule.
That happened when money became a form of free speech. If you've never taken the time to ask why a billionaire spends hundreds of millions to back one candidate or another, or asked why someone who is very wealthy spends millions of his or her own money to fund the application for a job that only pays the low 6 figures a year, for a limited time, chances are you're voting for reasons contrary to your beliefs, and you don't know it, because they're good at getting you to vote that way.
The American Dream is still alive, but it's on life support now because the system is rigged against the average person to the point that it's almost faded to black. No pun intended, but our politics has also become a game of 'blame the unqualified black president', and that's not lost on me. The blame game has never been louder than it's been in recent years-I for one am not naive enough to ignore the common denominator. When someone shouts, "I'm not racist!", I can now say, "well, neither is Donald Sterling!". Really...he's not, but it goes a lot deeper than that. Our politics is killing our Dream-we must fix it, and we're running out of time.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
How Much Honesty Is Enough?
|
Posted:May 29, 2011 9:05 am
Last Updated:Oct 10, 2016 10:25 am
13747 Views
|
As adults, especially here, we express our rights to express ourselves as we see fit-some of us hurt others by doing so, sometimes intentionally, other times inadvertently, but for better or worse, we express ourselves. Our only hope is that when we express ourselves, or see someone else expressing themselves, what we see is real. I won't name names, but I read and watch bloggers, and have met a number of people from this site who are as real in person as they are in words, so maybe I'm one of the lucky few.
Having said that, I've also met people who, let's just say weren't quite as advertized, and because of the type of person that I am, I've found that many of these people have the best of intentions, but personal insecurities play a role in their latent or blatant deceptions. See, as adults, we're also very complex, and approach things in different ways. We all have our ways of tackling the obstacles of our lives, so I suppose what I'm saying is that, A.F.F. had primed many of us veterans, especially those who blog, to have zero tolerance when it comes to coming down on dishonest people, but a little open mind sometimes reveal that things aren't always what they seem.
Case in point; I've been accused many times of posting the picture of a white man in my profile, because when I send someone a face photo, I look several shades darker than my profile picture. Maybe it's because I know it's me, but I really don't understand why someone would think that picture is of a white man, or maybe I'm just too articulate to be black-what.ever. Some have dismissed me as a liar based on that profile picture alone, while others have asked about it and are convinced that I'm telling the truth.
So the question is, whether you receive an email, send an email and get a questionable response, or read blogs that seem to be, um..'stretched', where do you draw the line in the vetting process to feel comfortable? Are you the type that digs in below the surface to make your informed decision, or do you head for the hills if the cover of the book doesn't sit well with you? Do you really think I'm white? 
|
|
|
13
Comments
|
|
Don't Pat The Mayans On The Back Yet, But..
|
Posted:Mar 12, 2011 10:35 pm
Last Updated:Feb 15, 2014 10:25 pm
13099 Views
|
My profession deals with sorting out insurance claims after an act of God causes widespread damage, and as a result I've been face to face with many, many individuals and families who have dealt with varying levels of loss ranging from minor inconveniences to outright devastating loss of material things and human life. On one hand, it would seem that I benefit from other people's suffering, but people who do what I do make a difference in how people go on with their lives after such losses, as well as how they perceive insurance companies. Needless to say, it's a task that can be quite a challenging responsibility, but rewarding when carried out well.
I'm not writing to talk about my job, but rather to talk about the chain of events that have taken place around the world in the last year, especially around the Pacific Rim. I won't bore you with too many details, but in the last 2 years, there has been quite an unbelievable amount of earth movement around the world, but the last year has been quite taxing for our neighbors across the International Date Line. Now, don't get me wrong-the entire planet earth is a giant Pop Tart-mostly hard outside, and mostly mush in the middle, so there's always going to be movement. In fact, there are probably thousands of earth movements everyday-the thing is, we hardly ever feel most of them, but we definitely feel the big ones.
Where people may start developing some sort of Mayan paganism is because of recent 'big ones'. The last 2 years, there have been major quakes in Haiti, Chile, Pakistan, China, New Zealand and Japan, and I have a feeling that California may be getting one this year as well. Is it the end of the World as the Mayans predicted it? Maybe not, but we may be approaching another major shift in the way the earth is configured, and another major land mass may split from home and become an island. Case in point-California, in recent years has been drifting northward at the rate of one inch per year. In geological terms, that's warp speed, and with 37 million people there, an 8.9 quake is not going to be very good news at all, and the San Andreas Fault is past due for a 'big one'.
The fact is, the world isn't going to end anytime soon-at least not until our sun loses its shine and explodes, goes dark, and starts sucking everything in, and that's not supposed to happen for a few lifetimes, so before you empty out your bank accounts, max out credit cards and party like it's, well, 2011, I think you may be giving the Mayans too much credit. Just think of this year as another Y2K, and when the smoke clears, you may have your roofs blown off, your house flooded, your walls cracked, and your vehicles, boats and G6s smashed up. Hopefully you will not suffer any loss of life, and a guy like me may come by and try and help you sort it all out. In the meantime though, please pay attention to what's going on out there-it's not as far from home as you may think.
|
|
|
5
Comments
|
|
Is Your Man Putty-Trained?
|
Posted:Feb 11, 2011 11:34 am
Last Updated:Mar 12, 2011 9:28 pm
12967 Views
|
We all know that, at certain times in a relationship, the woman may start to feel like she's living with a instead of a man, and I won't delve into the reasoning behind that, as it's been covered here in the blogs in enough varieties to make Baskin Robbins envious. But, during these times, the woman begins to feel like a mother instead of a partner, because her man- just seems really clueless beyond reproach.
Let me help you with this one, folks-if you're with him, fucking him, buying him gifts, or you live together, he's far from clueless. The difference between a man who exhibits the semblance of childishness, and one who seems so manly you could just eat him alive, is his sensitivity to your needs, and how you reach that moment when it's manifested in his behavior. It's akin to that moment when a baby takes off the pull-up diaper, and pees in the toilet, hence the term 'Putty-Trained'.
Now, how do you know when your man is putty-trained? Again, I won't delve into too many details, but here are a few:
1. When you start to lose arguments with him, he pretty much has you pegged.
2. When you become the one doing most of the apologizing-women tend to hate it when their men are too peaceful, so they try to stir the pot once in a while.
3. If he tells you that those jeans DOES make your ass look big, and you actually laugh, not because it's good news, but because of the way he said it.
4. When he recognizes the difference between you just wanting to vent, and you actually needing his help.
5. When he starts recalling dates, however mundane they may seem, like that time when you had melted ice cream drip on your nose 4 years prior, and he licked it off..or something like that.
6. When, no matter what type of relationship you have with him, whether serious, casual, fuck buddy, whatever..you always feel special around him.
Now, beware, ladies-some men are so well-putty-trained that they can also use their powers for evil, so they may act -like just to push your buttons, maybe because you're so cute when you're pissed off, or whatever.
So, is your man putty-trained?
|
|
|
5
Comments
|
|
A Love Letter To All The B.B.W.s...Sorta
|
Posted:Feb 3, 2011 5:02 am
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2012 9:05 pm
13785 Views
|
**DISCLAIMER** I can take whatever you choose to throw at me after reading this, but understand that it's not meant to disparage anyone, although I can't help whatever the impact of my truth may have on you-so there.
So, you see the images of two women here. Women who look like both of them have profiles on A.F.F., and they usually describe themselves as a B.B.W., or Big Beautiful Woman. Many of these women receive lots of insulting emails about their weight, and I think that's extremely fucked up, so much so that they will offer that description of themselves in their profiles, and implore those who aren't attracted to them to simply move on and not rub the blubber in, so to speak. But, we all know just how many men actually read profiles, right? I digress.
Some of these women tend to post very strategic photos of themselves in their profiles, so you will see photos of just boobs, or just lips, or just eyes-maybe a foot wearing very nice shoes..you get the idea-not saying that every woman who posts strategic pictures is a B.B.W., but you rarely see a full body picture of a B.B.W. in her profile, and I'm sure there are many reasons for that, one of which is probably to avoid getting hurtful and vitriolic messages from ass turds who know better but hide behind their anonymity to be ass turds. Again, I digress.
Now, I, Templar_S, am a guy looking at these two women, and I want all you women to see the perspective of a man like me reading the profiles of these two women. The fact of the matter is, only one of these women is truly a B.B.W.-heck, I'd do her six days a week and not even bother to rest on the seventh day! The other woman though? I'm sorry, but she's one 'B' short of a B.B.W.-she is what she is, which is, a big woman-there simply ain't nothing beautiful about it. Now, some folks may say that she may be beautiful on the inside-that may be true if the woman is truly happy to look like that, but I have to respectfully disagree, because no inner beauty would willingly let that happen to the outer one, and the outer ugliness simply buries the inner beauty too deep for me to find it-I'm speaking metaphorically, folks. When I look at a person that big, male or female, it's not with disdain, but with concern, because so many factors can take someone that far, and it takes such a tough fight to come back from it-sadly, many lose that fight.
So, I'm saying this respectfully, ladies-there's a cut off line for a man like me between you crossing over from a B.B.W. into B.W. territory, and you do have a right to call yourself whatever you feel, but if you're big enough to take up two seats when you fly coach, your inner beauty has a lot of fighting to do to get my attention. This is my opinion only, so please do yourself a favor-stop eating triple cheeseburgers and large fries with a diet coke-start stocking up on carrot sticks and invest in a treadmill, or better yet, join the Y!
|
|
|
10
Comments
|
|
Templar_s Must-See TV...If You Have No Life Like Me! :))
|
Posted:Jan 24, 2011 5:07 pm
Last Updated:Feb 3, 2011 3:25 am
12590 Views
|
So, I was checking out the brilliant Ms. kelidgh's blog [blog kelidgh], and she listed some of her favorite TV shows. Since I have no life really, I watch a rather abnormal amount of TV-now, mind you, I watch a lot of TV by catching up online, so I don't watch that much live TV except for sporting events.
Sadly, the networks, including cable networks, have discovered that you can pack up a bunch of real-life people, has-been celebrities, wanna-be celebrities and all manners of people in between, have them act really stupidly (or have them pretend to be stupid), and it's a lot cheaper to produce, and the profit margin is really high because people actually love to see train wrecks on TV, and advertisers follow suit. The good news is, amidst all the reality overload, there's some really good stuff on TV, and without further ado, here's a sampling of my favorites, in no particular order:
Mad Men:Dick Whitman is a man desperate to get away from his tumultuous past. He joins the military, and while at war, his fellow soldier, Don Draper, gets killed, but was misidentified as him. He seized the opportunity and assumes Draper's identity, moves to NY and becomes a successful ad executive. He marries a beautiful socialite, they have and he moves them to the suburbs. His socialite wife secretly longs for the big city life of glamor that she left behind, and his secret eats away at him, causing him to get lost in booze and women. This show is set in the 50's and 60's, and is so well-written and well-acted, it will go down as one of the best TV dramas of all time. Seriously. I've never seen this show on TV, but I own DVD box sets of the first 3 seasons-I'll be first in line when season 4 comes out this spring.
Californication: David Duchovny plays a writer who has a , now a , with a woman who's obviously the love of his life. One of his books was adapted into a film, which was a hit, and in turn made his book a hit, so now the publishers are hot on his tail to write his next book, but all the glitz and glamor got to him, and he developed writer's block. He spiraled out of control with alcohol, pot and pussy, until the love of his life leaves. He obviously has a heart of gold, but he just can't seem to get it together. I really love this show.
Big Love:This show is about a polygamist who's married to 3 women,one of whom is the of a well-known prophet of an isolated polygamist sect. He and his wives live in a community where polygamy is not openly accepted, so he attempts to live a 'normal' life by hiding 2 of his wives from the public. He himself is the of a deceased polygamist prophet, and believes that he's the next 'chosen one' to lead the movement. He's an ambitious owner of a big hardware store, and always strives for more, but he has to balance his desire to be a righteous leader, live his lifestyle openly with his family, and the societal resistance to their lifestyle. Great show also, currently in its final season.
Entourage:Loosely based on the life of Mark Wahlberg, who is also the executive producer of the show. It's about a young guy from the east coast who moves to LA, and with the help of an agent who has recently set up his own talent agency two of his childhood friends and his older brother who is now a has-been celebrity, he becomes a movie star. The show give you an unapologetic view of how show business works, and features appearances of real celebrities in the mix. You will laugh till your ribs hurt if you're not turned off by the excessive indulgences of these spoiled-rotten people.
Secret Diary Of A : It's a true story about a woman who moves from her hometown to London. She was approached by a madam, and became a high-priced escort, started blogging about her life and her blog became so popular that she was approached by a publisher to write a book. The show is basically her blog made into a comedy, and plays out the daily life of a . It's quite interesting.
Honorable mentions include The Big C, True Blood, Damages, The United States Of Tara and Rescue Me.
My guilty pleasures are Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice, Desperate Housewives, and V. I pretty much watch these online-what can I say? I love women, so I watch a few girly shows. happyf;
I told you-I have no life.
|
|
|
5
Comments
|
|
State Of The Union...It's All Your Fault-And Mine Too
|
Posted:Dec 11, 2010 7:42 am
Last Updated:Jan 7, 2011 2:57 am
12640 Views
|
You know how things work really great here in our adult playground, as long as people are honest, respect others and play fair? Same goes for capitalism and politics-in America, that's the order of the day. Now, does that happen consistently, I mean in terms of people playing fair, respecting others and being honest? Right.
I love this country, just like many of us do, because it's one of those places where, if you really work your ass off at something, chances are you'll make a decent living of it, despite the fact that it may sometimes seem like the cards are stacked against your success. That's basically the underlying root premise of capitalism-that your well-being is basically motivated by, and mostly dependent on as much money as you can not only earn, but spend as well. In many cases, when it works, it's a beautiful thing, but when it doesn't, shit gets ugly mighty fast-pardonnez mon Francais!
American politics is another thing that I(used to)love. You get an individual that speaks passionately about issues that directly affect me adversely, and this individual vows to correct many of these wrongs, and after being elected to office, proceeds to do so. Now, this individual also stands to gain from his or her good deeds, but as long as my needs are being met, who cares, right? It's only fair that, in said capitalist society, good deeds ought to be rewarded the capitalist way-with money. Again, when it works, it's beautiful, but when it doesn't, that society goes through a succession of events similar to what most of us has experienced the last 10 years. We all know the gist of it all, so I won't bore you with examples.
Since we all know what happens here on A.F.F., how when things look too good to be true, they probably are, same goes for politics, and things are getting worse-in terms of capitalism and politics, anyway-at least here in our playground, you have the power to simply walk away. You cam walk away from America too, but that's not so easy, and I'll touch on that later.
You know why the rich get richer, and the poor can't seem to get ahead? It's because politics allow the rich to bend, or outright break a lot of rules with very little repercussion-us little folks go to jail disproportionately. You know why politicians do it? Because they gain more by doing things in favor of the rich than they do by doing things for everyone else. Not only does that already hurt everyone else, but so much is being done on credit, and very little is being collected in taxes to pay that credit debt-last time I checked, it has reached 14 TRILLION dollars, and counting. In a way, rich folks are getting richer at the expense of the rest of us, and getting away with it, so before you get read the next State Of The Union address in about a month or so, allow me to give you a summary of what you're probably not going to hear.
Politicians no longer fight for a cause in this country-they merely fight to keep their jobs once we've all handed it to them. Why, you ask? Because it's highly profitable. No, not the $225k we pay congress members, or the $400k we pay the president annually-but the millions that they gain after serving us, or sometimes, while they're serving us. This past election in California, candidate Meg Whitman spent $140 million, MILLION, of her own money to run for governor, and she lost. Mitt Romney spent about $80 million of his own money to run for president, and didn't even make it past the primary election, so ask yourself this question the next time you see someone running for office; why is anyone willing to spend 80 to 140 million of their own money to fight for a 4-year job that pays no more than 400 thousand a year, and has very shitty work hours? If any politician ever answers that question truthfully, let me know.
Get ready, folks-the next non-incumbent candidate to be elected president of this country is going to spend over a billion, BILLION dollars, to do so. In a country where fewer than 10% of the population actually contribute money to politics, how does a single candidate have a billion dollars at their disposal to fun for office? And, what effect does it have on our politicians to spend that much money just to get elected? I don't dislike Bill Clinton-he's a guy who mastered the game, and played it well. But, before Bill Clinton became president in 1992, he and his wife were not even millionaires. Today, just 10 years after he left office, Bill and Hilary Clinton have a combined worth of over 120 million dollars. What does Bill Clinton do for a living? Yep.
So, how are all these our faults? 2 main reasons:
1. We elect them without doing proper homework: You see an ad on TV, and it says something like, 'Obamacare-it will kill the elderly!' And many of us say, "this guy wants to kill my momma!" Is the health care bill designed to kill people? Right-do your homework, people!
2. We have seriously bad habits, and we want to keep them:
Let's face it, Americans-we waste resources horrendously-we waste water, food, electricity, natural gas, oil, etc..we waste everything. You know why? It's all too cheap, that's why, and we always elect politicians who promise to let us keep on wasting. I won't go into details, so if you want examples, just ask.
Can we escape all this by just moving elsewhere? Ha! Maybe for some, but the fact is, it won't be easy. The easiest thing to do is fix the problems we have here. We all have to make sacrifices to make it happen, and we have to elect our leaders more intelligently. I know it's a long post, but believe me, I could have made it 3 times as long, but I wanted at least 10 or 15 people to read the whole thing, lol!
|
|
|
4
Comments
|
|
Age Of Consent...Boys Vs. Girls, Battle Of The Sexes, Statutory ..
|
Posted:Nov 18, 2010 3:18 am
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2012 9:14 pm
14030 Views
|
Ok, so I have a dear female friend, and she and I occasionally engage in debates about the sexes-I love these conversations not only because we're so adept at pushing each other's buttons with the men/women issues, but also because I always ended up learning something new about how what men say about women, or feminine references that men use against one another, truly offend some women. So, she educates me, but I swear, I going to start a 'masculist' movement just to balance things back!!
Now, the subject at hand: Not only am I a parent, but I happen to have a and a , and as such, I have a position, and the responsibility to view things from male and female perspectives. Naturally, I have a better command of the former, but I feel very close to women, so I understand a lot of feminine points of view-maybe that's why they love me so much, eh? 
This may become lengthy, but I'll try to keep myself reeled in. Question is, when is statutory actually ? Is it age-related, and if so, who determines the right age? In this country, most people believe that 18 is that magic age, so when you're 18, you're an adult, so you can exercise all your adult rights..except you can't buy/consume alcohol legally, or rent a car, but you can carry arms and go to war and get your body parts blown off! Anyway, I digress. How can you be called an adult, but you still have a limit to your adulthood?
I have a small advantage of having seen other cultures, and growing up in other cultures, so I'm entirely 'un-American' in some of my views as it relates to age. We've seen school teachers go to prison for engaging in sexual acts their teenage students who are under the age of 18. It's against the law here-I get that, but is it really if it's consensual on both sides? My female friend says yes, and I say maybe for a girl, but for a boy, it's like living a dream.
In my humble opinion, as a boy who has daydreamed about many a female school teacher, the same rules just do not apply. If we were to follow the traditional male/female rules of courtship, the man makes the move, and the woman determines if he gets the prize or not. The man's job is to sweeten things so as to lower the woman's defenses through his actions-he must activate all the cues that soften the woman up for this. That fact makes it more of a crime for me if the adult is male and the youngster is female, because that dynamic is a lot more skewed in the adult's favor, and that also applies in a same-sex situation. Where I would concede defeat in this argument is in a power play, where the adult gets their way by using their power to gain that advantage-in this case you can call it statutory , while we adults call it sexual harassment. If the actually consents to the sex, and I simply do not consider to be (I'll come back to that later), the actually takes over the position of power, because the adult has now technically committed a crime, and yes, the teenage is very aware of this. As a teenage boy, if I'd gotten some of that hot teacher tail, it would have been a dream come true, not a crime-now, if a male teacher had screwed my sister...As a parent, I won't encourage my to do anything of the sorts, but if it happened, my first line of investigation would be to see how it happened-if it was a power play, it's a crime-if my charmed the teacher's panties off, he gets a gold-plated playa card! My ? Different story-if I man can fool an adult woman for sex, think how much easier it is to break a girl's defense down..but again, if she initiated contact though, how the hell is that a crime? Sure, you can say that an adult should know better, and they should, but does that warrant prison time, really?
Ok, so Americans see the age 18 as the magic number-sorry, not I. By the time I was 13 years old, I had watched porn, gone to night clubs, had beer, and tried cigarettes, cigars and pipes. I stayed with porn, the night life and alcohol..tobacco products, not so much. In Germany, a 14 year-old can consume beer with their parents' permission, but they can't purchase it until they're 16, and teenagers having sex, even with 20-year olds is not a crime-yes, folks, in the rest of the world, teenagers are not treated like -that's the time when they start figuring out a lot of things for themselves.
Understandably, Americans would tend to frown at these facts, but is it because of that magic number 18? Sure, teenagers tend to do a lot of things they're probably not ready for, but how are they to learn to be independent if they have laws and hovering parents around all the time? I've met women in their 40's who had never experienced an orgasm, and people who don't know how to boil rice, or sew a torn button on their shirt, or replace a flat tire-I'm talking about people here, not just women. The question is, when does an American adult actually become an adult? Think about it. Feel free to die for your country as an 18 year old adult, but have a Heineken, or screw a 17 year old, or both at the same time, and you will get locked up-nice!
|
|
|
8
Comments
|
|
Michael Vick: Still In The House..
|
Posted:Oct 5, 2010 8:36 am
Last Updated:Oct 14, 2010 1:58 pm
13161 Views
|
I was watching the Redskins/Eagles game on Sunday, and of course, I was glad to see the Redskins win that game to even their season record to 2-2. While Donovan McNabb did a fairly decent job, I couldn't help but feel 2 obvious facts, even as a non-Eagles fan:
1. Michael Vick took a vicious hit at the goal line, and that hit sidelined him off that game, and perhaps one or two more games.
2. The only reason the Redskins won that game was because of Michael Vick being sidelined due to said vicious hit-the only answer that Redskins defense had for Vick was to put him out of business, albeit temporarily.
I decided to post this commentary because when it comes to Michael Vick, based on people that I've spoken to, there appears to be 3 camps of opinions out there. There are people who love animals so much that there could never be any hope of redemption or forgiveness for Vick. Then there are people who really don't care about animals that much, and just think that Vick is a good football player. I'm with the 3rd camp-the ones who feel that, as much as I care about animals, I believe that once someone has done a crime and done his or her time, he or she deserves a second chance at getting on with their lives, talent be damned.
If I ever committed a crime, be it white collar, blue collar, or however people choose to categorize the crime, I would hope that, as a human being, after being punished for my crime, I can move on, and my REAL friends would still be my friends, or at least allow me that second chance. We have a system of justice in this country where we are judged by a jury of our peers, and whatever happens in court, that is the system that we have, and we have to accept it. That's not to say that guilty people haven't gotten away with crimes, or that innocent people have not been wrongly convicted for crimes they didn't commit, but this is our criminal justice system, and we have to abide by it as a society. Don't like it? Try living in Iran, where you can be killed for cheating on your spouse, or North Korea, where you can be imprisoned for being in possession of a non-D.P.R.K. publication, or even United Arab Emirates, where public displays of affection between an unmarried couple will land you in prison-I guarantee you'll be back!
Now, that is not to say that people have no right to their feelings. I'm not saying that you have to love a Michael Vick, or a Michael Jackson, or a Roman Polanski, or an Aileen Wuornos(eek!), or any other person you may view as a menace to society-I'm just saying that you have to allow them to get on with their lives once they've been punished for their crimes. For someone to wish a Michael Vick harm, or death, now that he is no longer cruel to animals...is that really fair?
At the end of the day, the criminal justice system has released him, because he has served his punishment. He served time in prison, and he lost a lot of his wealth, and a lot of his dignity, and he's trying to rebuild all those thinks. I think that it's only fair that he be allowed to prove himself worthy.
I'm not a Philadelphia Eagles fan, but I have to admit it-he may not be a heck of a guy, but Michael Vick is one heck of a football player-please let him play.
|
|
|
7
Comments
|
|
Motivation For Suicidal Thoughts...
|
Posted:Sep 7, 2010 3:04 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2010 5:05 pm
13121 Views
|
I think I should preface this by saying; not to worry, folks-I'm fine, and have no desire to off myself. However, if you want to send me large sums of money, I'll provide services!
Being the creature of random thoughts that I am, it occurred to me that suicide is a phenomenon that has always fascinated and baffled me. When I was in high school, back in Lagos, 2 of my dear friends, one male, one female, took their own lives. A dear friend of mine, 2 years ago in Washington, DC, succumbed to the ill effects of bipolar disorder-she was very depressed, and after what appeared to be months of planning, she decided to spare her husband and dear friend of decades the pain of enduring her moods(her words in her farewell letter), and took her own life shortly after her 60th birthday. Others have also tried, but survived the attempt.
Much credit goes to my maternal grandmother, as well as my parents, for raising me to be an optimist. I'm someone who strongly believes that hardship is temporary, and if one perseveres and works through hardship, there's always light at the end of the tunnel. The tricky part is how long one is willing to wait to see that light, and how one handles periods of hardship. Being someone who has experienced periods of near-poverty as well as near-luxury throughout my life, I've become something of an expert at it. I can do with just as well as I can do without, and I do it even to this day-sometimes I have quite a bit, and sometimes I have nothing, and that's ok, because as an alive person, I have the ability to correct my circumstances when they're poor-if I'm dead, I'm done, and no chance to do anything. If I take my own life, I will never have a chance to visit Australia, or Fiji, or Brazil, or Malta, or France, Corsica or Madeira Island, see my have , or see my parents die gracefully. I will never again feel another kiss, a warm embrace, or the inner depths of a woman's love. I will never drive an exotic car, fly first class again, travel again by high speed rail, take a Mediterranean cruise..I could go on. Why would anyone give up any hopes of further experiencing this majestic world?
So, what makes someone want to just end it all? Why do some people just decide that when things aren't going necessarily as wanted, the solution is the ultimate finality? How strong are you emotionally? Must you always get what you want? And, if you don't get what you want, or if things aren't going your way, how do you usually deal with it? Is this world so bad that the end of it all, or the unknown world (or even if one exists) actually becomes more desirable? Have you ever thought about it? Do you ever see someone else as an obstacle to your happiness, and wish there was a way to 'get them out of the way'? Would you care for an adversarial person if you were in a position to do so? Do you feel entitled to things that others have but you don't? Are you a forgiving person, or do you carry a grudge for extended periods of time? What's in the mind of a suicidal person? Why don't we ever seem to know, or aptly recognize the signs until it's too late?
|
|
|
3
Comments
|
|
Don't Read This If You Have A Weak Stomach
|
Posted:Aug 28, 2010 5:21 am
Last Updated:Sep 22, 2010 5:43 am
13863 Views
|
As a member of this site, I still believe that the one thing that poisons this website more than any other, to me, by far, is dishonesty. Some lies merely make you feel like a fool, disappoint you, or cause you to make some other minor uninformed decisions...but some lies can be very, very hazardous to your health. A good friend of mine sent me an article today, and I feel it's my duty to share.
We have, or rather, had a member on this site who recently got arrested. He's an HIV positive member of the U.S. Air Force, and was apprehended after an ongoing investigation revealed that he'd been knowingly having unprotected sex with members of this community. The short of it is that, apparently he was diagnosed with the infection while he was stationed in Italy. In Italy, he notified people he had been with that he had become infected, but then he got transferred to the McConnell Air Force Base in Wichita, KS, and since then, he and his wife had become fixtures at local swinger parties, and here, he had never disclosed to anyone that he was HIV positive, and he's been with a lot of women, and men, and apparently a transsexual or two, including a regular lady who is most likely also infected by now. You can read the details for yourself at www dot thesmokinggun dot com/file/usaf-hiv-probe.
This guy has 2 Passion profiles; WetnWild4U2692, and Luv4U269me3. The latter has photos of him engaged in unprotected sex, most likely with his wife or the poor regular friend of his, and this same profile shows a number of people in his network, as well as a few testimonials.
Please look through the names, including those in the testimonials, and if you know any of them, ensure that they have been notified. Reading the testimonials, I have to say, turned my stomach a bit-not about the sexual acts per se, but of what lurked underneath the entire time all these acts were taking place.
Fortunately, I don't know any of these people, but I think it's time for me to get tested again, just to remain on the safe side.
Hopefully, the suits at Passion already know about this, and will let us talk about it, and not try to sweep this under the rug by blocking blogs or comments comments about it.
|
|
|
7
Comments
|
|
Cell Phones Part Deux..America Vs. The World
|
Posted:Aug 14, 2010 8:55 am
Last Updated:Sep 7, 2010 12:19 pm
9274 Views
|
The phone in this picture is the one that I use, and it's one heck of a gadget, but I won't bore you with the details, except to say that it's an unlocked phone-more on that later. No American wireless carrier offers this phone, what with the Droid and I-Phone fever going on, but when I went to South Africa, with all the nationalities gathered in one place, I was surprised to see more people with my phone than the I-Phone-except Americans, of course.
My commentary is really not about the devices themselves, but the cost of using them. Here in the US, we're familiar with the calling plan, where you get X amount of minutes, or indeed unlimited minutes and data for a fixed price-simple enough, right? Right, unless you're an international traveler like me, then having an American cell phone quickly becomes a nightmare. Outside the US, the most popular way to use cell phones is with prepaid plans-you buy just what you need, and buy more as you need it. Most American cell phones nowadays will work just about anywhere, if you have a GSM phone(AT&T, T-Mobile), which is the one that uses a SIM card, as opposed to a CDMA phone(Verizon, Sprint), which in America, doesn't use a card, but will also work outside the States, though you'd be stuck with your carrier's roaming charges. If you use your American cell phone in another country, roaming charges can get as high as $4 a minute, and get this; the charge applies once the call is connected, so if your phone rings, that's up to $4, even of you don't answer it! I learned this the hard way, but some folks have traveled, only to return home to thousand dollar cell phone bills.
On the surface, you would think that prepaid costs more than a plan, but you'd be right and wrong, depending on how you use your phone. If you only use your phone to make important calls, check your email a couple of times a day and not much else, prepaid is a huge money saver, but if you're a Facebook junkie, a text monster and you can't get enough of Passion, youtube or other online video, stay away from prepaid. For an American, the cheapest solution when traveling is to immediately swap your American SIM card for a prepaid one in your destination country once you leave American soil. The problem with that is, American cell phones are 'locked', which means they will only work with your wireless provider's SIM card, so once you leave the US, they're nothing but bricks, unless $4 a minute is chump change for you. With a simple code, these phones can be 'unlocked', so that they become compatible with any SIM card you stick in them-some people also refer to this as 'jail-breaking', when individuals hack into the phone themselves without any help from the wireless carrier, and the phones become usable anywhere-this was a very common thing when the I-Phone first came out, and non-AT&T users had to have it. By law, wireless companies are supposed to give you that code to unlock your phone, but only if you're traveling outside the US, and they do it very reluctantly, because with the phone unlocked, you can also sign up with a competitor here in the US with your unlocked device. This is one reason why unlocked phones such as mine are becoming more popular with Americans-I can pretty much use my phone anywhere, natch.
Non-Americans (and Canadians?) have more freedom with their cell phones-they all carry unlocked phones, meaning they don't have to be enslaved by any carrier for 2 years. Europeans can use their phones anywhere in Europe and Africa without roaming charges, but they also face huge charges when they come to America(yea capitalism!). Unlike Americans being able to purchase SIM cards everywhere for our unlocked phones when we travel, foreigners coming to America are stuck with buying prepaid phones instead, because you can rarely purchase just the prepaid SIM card here.
My question just goes back to America increasingly lagging behind the world, and this is just another example. Those who don't travel have been programmed to think that this place is Utopia, and there's nothing better out there. While we still have more rights than most countries, we Americans are beginning to fall behind on education, technology, manufacturing, etc, because our leaders are no longer emphasizing the importance of those things to our well-being and social status in the world-we're very quickly becoming a shell of our old selves and it's sad. What can we do to turn things around? Do enough people know what's going on? Do people even care?
|
|
|
5
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (templar_s) use [blog templar_s] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
1
|
2
|
31
|
4
|
5
|
6
|
7
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
|
|
